By Margo Lawson
I stand at the end, staring at my life's path. The path ahead is dark; if I move, I'll be blind. My heart beats heavily, and my face feels wet. So instead of facing my demons, I look back at the past. I watch my memories swirl around me, filled with familiarity.
I see my friends and I laughing, and my tears are wiped away. I see the early mornings of drinking coffee to stay awake and the late nights of thinking a test would end the world. I remember the embarrassing times when I was filled with anger. I understand those emotions now, but more than anything, through all of the sad feelings and the annoyed thoughts, I see my heart is filled with joy at finding people who I love. Having people there for me always, and I relax.
Looking around, I know where I am, understand my life, and feel calm. Seeing this makes sense, and I have lived through what I have for a purpose. Suddenly, on the back of my neck, my skin prickles. I risk a glance backward and see the swirling darkness of my future. I bite my lip, wishing to live in memories forever.
I sigh shakily to myself before turning around and facing the inky dark. My memories dance around behind me, keeping near me always, and I know that what I have been through will never be forgotten. I am not becoming new; I am simply growing and moving on. My past is a part of me, and it always will be.
With one final breath of my memories, I walk forward and enter the unknown. Because yes, it is scary, and no, I do not know what it will lead to. But I also know that it is my future and mine alone. And if I never step toward it, then I'll be stuck. And the idea of that is the most terrifying of them all. So instead of fearing the unknown, I embrace it and allow my memories to lead and protect me as I start the journey to create new ones.
As I step forward, I smile because I know I will not travel alone. And I thank myself for the journey I have gone on so far and for all the people and experiences I keep and hold forever. And as I walk into the unknown, I feel less panicked and less nervous. And instead, I only feel grateful and at peace with the future; suddenly, the future looks a little less dark.
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